Dear Blogger,

I didn't forget abt you blog.
I didn't mean to make you sad by my passing remarks or intriguing conversation.But sometimes I need more that a voice over the phone, or text on my computer. Its hard to deal with my own problem, alone. i feel talking about it wouldn't solve the problem. Rather, start doing something... or something that can make me forget.

Talking on the phone... i feel that you dun dare to do tell me this, tell me tat. Hmm... i also dun understand why cant you tell me your true feeling, rather than typing all this out on the net. I am in no position in saying this, i also can't express my feelings as well. 3 yrs plus... i dun like it this way... for myself, maybe because of my inability of expressing myself. I dun like to talk serious. I talk serious, i get depress. I am a joke myself. Thats why i always seems to be laughing. laughing at myself...
So many "i" in this paragraph, i feel so selfish. i am.

Sometimes i missed you. And i can't get this feeling so often. I try not to at least, if not i can't do anything in that depress mood. When i do the most i can do is give you a sms or a phone call. I need someone to touch. face to face. someone to smile with. Someone to . i dun know... Its hard to deal... i am having difficulty dealing with this.

You must be going through hell of a time. Knowing that you are alone over there, naturally you will feel empty and noone to distress abt your problem. Even though you have these good friends with you all the time, you can't really talk to them abt your problems... emptiness. i also dun know how to help you relieve your stress... maybe you tell me. Because i feel that i have not been a good bf lately, all i giving you is problems and my trouble.

Zhijie.